Avatar & Tron

I grouped these two together because they are the movies that I thought would crash and burn, and yet have somehow managed to thwart nature's plans. Sometimes, I feel as if I am hearing or seeing things completely different from everyone else, and these are the uncool movies that remind of this occasional phenomenon. Am I really truly alone?

Tron and Avatar both have great technology and animation softwares behind them, I'll admit to that much. Avatar's phosphorescent plants were pretty interesting and pretty, and Tron guys got bikes and fake, towering cities and all that. Although I think Avatar started looking like the Sims game when Jake SOO-LEE and his lady friend started getting frisky, and it took me like 5 minutes to figure out what that train-like transportation vehicle was in Tron, never mind that they were riding on it :/

Let me refresh your memory about Avatar. It was that really predictable movie with just the right combination of hot people, audience-pleasing "adventure," pretty scenery to distract from any shortcomings in other aspects of the film, and a few convenient deaths that remind you not only that this stuff is for reals, but also to make it easier to make a sequel with new hot people in it. It was all too obvious from the start—the only attractive female in the alien village is obviously the "movie girlfriend." Jake the noob is obviously going to be the one who miraculously conquers the head honcho of the alien dragon animals. Grace's death is determined basically the instant she is wounded. And finally, it's blatantly obvious that Jake is going to survive the change into a blue person—in fact, the only thing about the movie that dumbfounded me at all was the fact that there were not in fact any twists to the plot. Everything is so blatantly obvious and painfully transparent you just want to hit yourself and cry in a corner for having wasted your time.

What's funny is that none of this actually was born in James Cameron's head. Most people have already made the connection between this movie and Dances With Wolves, but a plot was apparently not enough for Cameron to make a movie out of. He got on very tricky terms with Russia for stealing the plot setting from a Russian book series published in the 60's. In this series, a bunch of human-like aliens called the "Nave" inhabited planet Pandora in the 22nd century.... need I say any more? As if that's not enough, I noticed he stole the helicopter-like Viper planes from the Incredibles—he didn't even bother to change the name. He's also accused for plagiarism of a book called Call Me Joe. Look—if Avatar is a tribute to all these past works... just say it? At least say, "Inspired by...." or "Based on...." If you take all the credit for what's unmistakably NOT YOURS, it just makes you sound like a total toolbox.

Tron didn't plagiarize anything as far as I could tell, thank heavens. I guess it was just really stale. Maybe it was that they tried to make absolutely everything exciting and amazing, or maybe it was just that none of it was any good in the first place. Either way, I really didn't get it at all. The girl in it also freaked me out, and I had to laugh when the dude's hair got all screwed up at the end. It was refreshing to see the vegetation and the "real world" after watching people toil in computer land, but most people would feel that way if they felt like they were trapped in a cellar for two long, painful hours. That's how I felt. I also kept thinking about how much my butt hurt from sitting on it, which is something I really only think of during the most boring math classes. It was just... stale. Disappointing. The music was fabulous, but I think the credit for that goes mostly to the band.

Am I the only one who feels this way? If I am... I'm really scared.